CHAT FOOTBALL FORUM

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A Bloke walks into a bric-a-brac shop and sees an ornamental brass rat, the sort of thing women of a certain age love to put on the mantlepiece. He thinks "that'll be perfect for his Mother's birthday", so he asks the shopkeeper how much it is.

"£25 for the rat, £100 for the story", replies the man.

"Forget the story" says the bloke, and so buys the rat for 25 quid. He walks off down the road, but has not gone 30 yards when a rat comes up from the gutter and starts to follow him. Soon more arrive, and in a few minutes the whole street is a sea of rats, all following the bloke, who keeps walking until he comes to a cliff. He throws the brass rat over, and millions of rats follow, one after each other, plunging to certain death. The bloke them runs back to shop.....

"Aaaah", says the shop keeper, "you'll be back for the story"

"Screw the story - do you have a brass Newcastle fan?"

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A Portsmouth fan about 8 years old goes into sports shop to buy this Portsmouth football he as seen in the window. Anyway he doesn’t know how much it is so he asks the shop assistant behind the counter. The assistant says, “its £25 matey.”
The little boy replies, “I have only got £5 pocket money”, so the assistant says “sorry but you will have to save up then.”

So the boy thinks and says to the assistant “I will do you a deal. Blind fold me and pick any football off that shelf and I bet I can guess what football team is on the ball. If I get it right you have to give me the Portsmouth ball.”

So the assistant thinks go on then he is only young. So he blind folds the little lad and he gets the ball off the shelf, puts it in front of the boys face and the boy shouts, “its Wolves!” The assistant in shock says, “How did you know that?”

The boy says, “I could hear the sound of a pack of wolves in the woods.” So the assistant says “Wow. Ok matey, let’s have another go.”
So he gets a ball from the shelf puts it in front of the boys face. The boy shouts “its Arsenal!”
The assistant says, “Wow, how did you get that?” The boy says, “I could hear the guns on a bloody war field.”

The assistant in total shock says, “Right, get this one and you can have the ball and the Beckham boots.” So he gets the ball puts it in front of the boys face. The boy shouts “Southampton.”
“Jesus! How did you get that one?” says the assistant.
The boy says, “Well, it’s going down.”

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very good, I liked that one.

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omg love that

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Hahahahahahahahaha excellent Libbi!

Hilarious Joke:

Arsenal's title hopes

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